SafeDate Pledge Explained: The Deposit That Stops Ghosting

Every single person in Nigeria has a story about being stood up.

You dressed. You paid for transport. You sat in a restaurant for forty minutes watching the door, checking your phone, ordering water so the waiter wouldn't judge you. And he never came. No message, no apology. Maybe a "sorry, traffic" the next day, maybe nothing.

That's the problem SafeDate was built for.

What it is

SafeDate is a deposit you and the person you're meeting both put in before the date. The deposit is held in coins, so it's real money, and you each put in the same amount. You meet. You both tap "We met". Both deposits go straight back to you.

If one of you doesn't turn up, things change. The person who showed up can report a no show once the meeting time has passed plus a short grace period. The other person then has 24 hours to dispute it. If nobody disputes, the deposit of the person who didn't show goes to the person who did, after a small platform fee. If it is disputed, the MyPerson team looks at it and decides.

You can also cancel a SafeDate before it's funded or well ahead of time and get your deposit back. It becomes too late to cancel in the last couple of hours before the meeting.

Who benefits

The person who's tired of being ghosted. Nobody wants to sit in a restaurant alone anymore.

The person who's nervous about meeting a stranger. If someone is willing to put a deposit down, they've told you they're real and they plan to be there.

Serious daters in general. It filters. People who aren't ready to commit to a Saturday afternoon rarely commit a deposit.

How a SafeDate goes

1. You match and chat. You call, because you read our post about calling before you meet. 2. You agree a time and place. Pick a public venue, perhaps one of the verified date venues. 3. One of you proposes a SafeDate with a deposit amount and the other accepts. 4. Both of you fund it. 5. You meet. You both tap "We met". The deposits come back.

It isn't about money

MyPerson sets a minimum and a maximum deposit, and you pick an amount you're comfortable with. If both of you show up, nobody pays anything. The point is to remind everyone that another person is planning their day around them.

Use it well

Don't make it a test of trust for a first conversation. Use it after you've chatted and called and you both want to meet. Combine it with the usual rules: public place, tell a friend, arrange your own ride. The full list is in our safety guide for women but it applies to men too.

Odd questions

What if something real stops me from coming? Cancel early in the app if you can. If you're accused of a no show unfairly, you have 24 hours to dispute it and the team reviews it.

Is it compulsory? No. It's an option for people who want it.